Qian+final+report



The report looks very good. Below are three things I saw that should be changed.

change this section title in the report body and in the table of contents from:

** How McDonalds Compete with Other Competitors in China **

to


 * How McDonalds Competes in China **

revise the recommendation section copy and use bullets rather than letters **

Recommendations ** To hold its market position in China, McDonalds should continue to use social media to attract Chinese Gen Y customers and promote its future business’ development. As it faces increased competition in China, McDonalds must:


 * Learn how Gen Y customers are different from their earlier customers.
 * Continue to learn how to use the modern communication technology to reach former and new customers.
 * Make use of instant messaging services such as QQ and Yahoo Messenger to reach former and new customers.
 * Make increased use of blogs to communicate to all customers or committees.
 * Use outdoor media to introduce new products and to involve or participate in social activities.

//I think you are mixing the science documentation with APA. You've got numbered references in the text but a list of sources by title. The easiest way to fix this is to go through and replace the numbers with the author or first title in the listing in the references. See example below from your first paragraph in the narrative body.//

McDonald’s originated in California in 1927. By 1963 its chain of McDonald’s owned and franchised restaurants had sold a billion hamburgers. In 1970 McDonald’s opened its first international restaurant in Costa Rica. In 1971, McDonald’s opened its first restaurant in Japan. By 1978 the 5000th world-wide restaurant was opened in Kanagawa, Japan. In 1990 McDonald’s opened its first Chinese restaurant in Shenzhen, China. (5) should be (History of McDonalds)

** References ** = Brandon (2009), “Facebook Blocked in China”. Retrieved on January 17, 2010 from [] = “China's "Gen Y" Bucks Tradition”. Retrieved on January 17, 2010 from []

Cho,Karen (2010), “KFC China’s recipe for success”. Retrieved January 16, 2010, from []

Dicos, China, web page. Retrieved on January 16, 2010 from []

“History of McDonald’s”, as retrieved on January 16, 2010 from []

“History of China”, as retrieved on January 16, 2010 from [].

Lau, Adeline, “McDonald's looks for Facebook friends”. Retrieved on January 17, 2010 from, []

McDonald’s Corporation Annual Report – 2008. Retrieved on January 16, 2010 from []

“Opening to the Outside World”, as retrived on January 16, 2010 from []

Stanat, Michael,” China’s Generation Y”, as offered by SIS International Research. Retrieved on January 16, 2010, from []

Stanat, Michael (2010), “China's Generation Y: Understanding the Future Leaders of the World's Next Superpower”. Retrieved on January 16, 2010 from []